Bird is the Word
|image = file:S3e09.jpeg |season = 3 |number = 9 |overall = 56 |network = ABC-TV |airdate = November 13, 1990 |writer = Joel Madison & Don Foster |director = John Whitesell |previous = PMS, I Love You |next = Dream Lover }}Bird is the Word was the 9th episode of Season 3 of Roseanne, also the 56th overall series episode. Written by Joel Madison and Don Foster, the episode was directed by John Whitesell. It originally aired on ABC-TV on November 13, 1990. Summary Becky is suspended after allegedly making an obscene gesture in her class photo which makes her suddenly popular at school, but Roseanne is the one called into the principal's office. Cast Starring *Roseanne Arnold as Roseanne Conner *John Goodman as Dan Conner *Laurie Metcalf as Jackie Harris *Michael Fishman as D.J. Conner *Sara Gilbert as Darlene Conner *Lecy Goranson as Becky Conner *Natalie West as Crystal Anderson (credit only) Guests *Adilah Barnes as Anne-Marie Mitchell *Dann Florek as Principal Hiller *Judith Jordan as Secretary Trivia * Adilah Barnes (Anne-Marie Mitchell) makes her first appearance. She will appear in a total of 16 episode throughout the series. * In the beginning scene, Darlene stumbles off the step in the kitchen as she asks Becky about her school picture. * When Jackie and Roseanne are looking at Becky's class picture (when it is placed on the table), it is shown that they are looking at it upside down. * Dan Florek (Principal Hiller) will later play Darlene's OB-GYN doctor in two consecutive episodes; "A Second Chance" and "The Miracle" during Season 9 * Despite being credited, Natalie West (Crystal Anderson) does not appear. Quotes :DJ (to Roseanne): Mom, how come Becky's got three hands in this picture? :Roseanne: Three hands...? :DJ: Yeah, look. :Roseanne: Lem' me see. (looks through DJ's magnifying glass and gasps) She didn't do it. I'll kill her! ---- :Roseanne: We can't control everything thing our kids do. Sooner or later they're just gonna do what they're gonna do. They're like people that way. ---- :Becky: I can't believe this! You guys weren't mad when you thought I did do it. Now you're mad because you know I didn't? God! Maybe next year I oughta moon the class photo so you guys are proud of me. :Roseanne: Make sure it's your own butt. ---- :Dan: (while explaining the middle finger to DJ): Here's the church, here's the steeple, open the door, and... you see that big guy sitting third from the left? Don't wave him at anybody. :DJ: But Mom did it in the car. :Roseanne: Hey, the idiot cut me off. ---- :Jackie: Hey, guys. Your son just gave Gilligan the finger. :Dan: Well, he's the reason they're stuck on that island! :Roseanne: Dan! ---- :Roseanne (as she speaks to the other mothers at the principal's office about the picture): Ah, do your kids do this in the family pictures? :Mother: No way. :Roseanne (to Principal Hiller): No, they do it here. :Annemarie: That's right. :Principal Hiller: Oh I see, following that logic, Mrs. Conner, as long as they're not stealing anything out of your living room, it's not your fault if they hold up a convenience store. :Roseanne: Hey, we're not talking about armed robbery here, OK? We're talking about some teenagers flipping the bird. I think we should get over it. :Principal Hiller: Maybe you're right but I don't think so. And neither do all these parents who have called in to complain about the photo. They want us to reshoot it at our cost and quite frankly, Mrs. Conner, this is not within our budget. So, what would your have me tell them about what your daughter did? :Roseanne (remembering her own teenage years with Annemarie): Ahh, that it's a political statement? ---- :Becky (in a sugar-coated voice): Look, everybody. Daddy's home! Oh, hi, Daddy! :Dan (to Becky, DJ, Darlene, and Roseanne): Hi, Princess, Bud, Kitten, Margaret. ---- Category:Season 3 Episodes